Words cannot express the gratitude I feel toward everyone who has prayed for this along with us. I never realized how many people were keeping up with our story. I am overwhelmed and humbled by the love that has been shown. Thank you for your prayers, even those we did not know before now, thank you! Our God is a powerful, faithful God, who answers our prayers.
We will continue to blog about our lives and this continued journey toward our baby Stella. Thanks again and God bless!
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
God's Timing....
It is hard to know where to begin today....first, I must apologize if this gets "rambly" or incoherent...I am working on very little sleep.(I was just too excited to sleep) Secondly, as many of you know we had a meeting with a birthmother last night. We original thought she would be meeting with us and one other family. This was truly hard for me because this meant that one of us was going to be extremely disappointed. I had been praying yesterday something would happen and they would back out, doubting that it could happen, but still praying none the less. Well, when we got there our social worker spoke with us before we met with the mother and told us the other family had emailed her and said they were not ready to adopt right now. Wow! I should know by now that God hears and answers the desires of our hearts.
Then we were taken back and introduced to the birthmother and she asked us questions and we talked about ourselves....well mostly Matt talked about us.=)(it is specialty, talking that is) We talked, cried and laughed with one another for about an hour. She told us how she would like me, to go to the remaining Doctors appts with her, to be in the delivery room with her and be the first one to hold the baby. We told her that we have had a name picked out. She asked what it was, we told her and she started to cry. The middle name we had picked is her middle name, her mother's middle name and her adult daughter's middle name. God is truly amazing. We talked some more and then at the end of the meeting she turned to us and asked if we would like to adopt her baby girl.
I am amazed at God and the gift that He has given us. Matt and I expected to be given a newborn at the hospital a few days after it was born. We never expected to be able to have the whole experience. But God knew how much we needed to have the "whole" experience and He knew the perfect woman who would and could give us that.
Matt and I are still a little shell shocked and still not really living in reality yet. I am sure that all the events of this week will slowly sink in, as we prepare to bring Stella Ann home with us. I do know for certain that I am one grateful women for the way that God provides, for a woman who is willing to give us our family, and for answered prayers. We are truly blessed!
In closing, I again want to share the verse that God gave us at the beginning of this long journey:
Jeremiah 29:11
AMEN!
Then we were taken back and introduced to the birthmother and she asked us questions and we talked about ourselves....well mostly Matt talked about us.=)(it is specialty, talking that is) We talked, cried and laughed with one another for about an hour. She told us how she would like me, to go to the remaining Doctors appts with her, to be in the delivery room with her and be the first one to hold the baby. We told her that we have had a name picked out. She asked what it was, we told her and she started to cry. The middle name we had picked is her middle name, her mother's middle name and her adult daughter's middle name. God is truly amazing. We talked some more and then at the end of the meeting she turned to us and asked if we would like to adopt her baby girl.
I am amazed at God and the gift that He has given us. Matt and I expected to be given a newborn at the hospital a few days after it was born. We never expected to be able to have the whole experience. But God knew how much we needed to have the "whole" experience and He knew the perfect woman who would and could give us that.
Matt and I are still a little shell shocked and still not really living in reality yet. I am sure that all the events of this week will slowly sink in, as we prepare to bring Stella Ann home with us. I do know for certain that I am one grateful women for the way that God provides, for a woman who is willing to give us our family, and for answered prayers. We are truly blessed!
In closing, I again want to share the verse that God gave us at the beginning of this long journey:
Jeremiah 29:11
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
AMEN!
Monday, July 1, 2013
Interesting week....
Matt and I had an interesting adoption journey last week. First off, Tuesday night we were having dinner with a work colleague of Matt's in Marian. When we were finishing up our meals and just talking a bit, Matt's and I's phones start going crazy. When we finished and headed for the car we checked our voicemails. We had messages from a gal in our small group and her mom. That all lead back to a social worker who had a birthmother that needed a family. We calmed our nerves and called the social worker. After a lengthy conversation with her we find out that the baby girl's Corpus Callosum did not form properly and would we be willing to take a special needs baby. I told her that we would need to do some research and talking and get back to her. This was one of the hardest decisions we had to make. We have waited so long that we had to set aside our strong longing for a child and look at the "big picture". After doing some research we discovered that most babies born with this have severe handicaps. With that in mind we talked and prayed about what to do and when the text came from the social worker Wednesday night we told her no.
Feeling pretty blue and without much hope we carried on into Thursday.
On Thursday in the morning, Matt receives a call from our social worker, Allison. She told Matt that there is a birthmother who is interested in us and would like to meet. She too, is having a baby girl and is due within the next month or so. Wow! We said no to one baby and the very next day God gives us another opportunity, with a healthy baby girl.
We will be meeting with this mother on July 8th at 4:30. We are trying to keep our excitement to a minimum though, because the mother is meeting with us and another family.
We have been waiting so long with very little hope to cling to and now this week we were presented with two situations....God is good. We know that we may not be picked for this baby girl but it has given us a renewed hope. Please pray with us as we look forward to the 8th. Pray that whatever the outcome we will be, we will be able to rest in the knowledge that God is in control of this journey and leading us to our baby.
Feeling pretty blue and without much hope we carried on into Thursday.
On Thursday in the morning, Matt receives a call from our social worker, Allison. She told Matt that there is a birthmother who is interested in us and would like to meet. She too, is having a baby girl and is due within the next month or so. Wow! We said no to one baby and the very next day God gives us another opportunity, with a healthy baby girl.
We will be meeting with this mother on July 8th at 4:30. We are trying to keep our excitement to a minimum though, because the mother is meeting with us and another family.
We have been waiting so long with very little hope to cling to and now this week we were presented with two situations....God is good. We know that we may not be picked for this baby girl but it has given us a renewed hope. Please pray with us as we look forward to the 8th. Pray that whatever the outcome we will be, we will be able to rest in the knowledge that God is in control of this journey and leading us to our baby.
Thursday, May 23, 2013
Little God things....
This week has been a series of little messages from God. First, off in of my devotions this week, when I was having a particularly hard time, The Solo devotional had me read Isaiah 54. If you don't know it, the first verse of this chapter is;
“Sing, barren woman,
you who never bore a child;
burst into song, shout for joy,
you who were never in labor;
because more are the children of the desolate woman
than of her who has a husband,”
says the Lord.
So...what do you say after that. I just spent the morning having a very candid conversation with God about our journey and how I felt it was going. I then sit down to do my devotions and pray that God would give me some way of breaking free from the fog I was walking through. Ask and you shall receive, right?!
Then awhile back I prayed about blogging the song "Worn". It is a powerful song that I feel really describes where Matt and I are emotionally. So, I prayed that if I ever heard the song twice on the way to work I would know that I was suppose to blog it. Bringing us to yesterday morning, I was on the way to work listening to the radio, I usually will flip between three local Christian channels, I don't like commercials.=) So, I was flipping through them and I stop on WBCL, who was playing "Worn". They then went to a commercial and I flipped to The Pulse, who you guessed it, was playing "Worn". Because I found this to be a little overwhelming, I turned off the radio for a little while and sat silent in God's presence. I decided to turn it back on and The Pulse was on a commercial so I flipped it to WFRN, and guess what?! "Worn". Now this blew my mind for two reasons....1. God is bigger then my imagination can comprehend and 2. I finally heard something in the song that I had heard before but was always frustrated by, but yesterday it gave me hope. The chorus has a line that says, "...all that's dead inside can be reborn..." and it changes in the end to "all that's dead inside WILL be reborn". It WILL be, it is a guarantee with God. A guarantee....I am holding on to that promise. So, hear is the song for you. It is a very honest representation of where Matt and I are right now, but it WILL be reborn.
http://www.godtube.com/watch/?v=0FJC2JNU
Thank you for your continued prayers. God is showing me daily that He IS still working.
“Sing, barren woman,
you who never bore a child;
burst into song, shout for joy,
you who were never in labor;
because more are the children of the desolate woman
than of her who has a husband,”
says the Lord.
So...what do you say after that. I just spent the morning having a very candid conversation with God about our journey and how I felt it was going. I then sit down to do my devotions and pray that God would give me some way of breaking free from the fog I was walking through. Ask and you shall receive, right?!
Then awhile back I prayed about blogging the song "Worn". It is a powerful song that I feel really describes where Matt and I are emotionally. So, I prayed that if I ever heard the song twice on the way to work I would know that I was suppose to blog it. Bringing us to yesterday morning, I was on the way to work listening to the radio, I usually will flip between three local Christian channels, I don't like commercials.=) So, I was flipping through them and I stop on WBCL, who was playing "Worn". They then went to a commercial and I flipped to The Pulse, who you guessed it, was playing "Worn". Because I found this to be a little overwhelming, I turned off the radio for a little while and sat silent in God's presence. I decided to turn it back on and The Pulse was on a commercial so I flipped it to WFRN, and guess what?! "Worn". Now this blew my mind for two reasons....1. God is bigger then my imagination can comprehend and 2. I finally heard something in the song that I had heard before but was always frustrated by, but yesterday it gave me hope. The chorus has a line that says, "...all that's dead inside can be reborn..." and it changes in the end to "all that's dead inside WILL be reborn". It WILL be, it is a guarantee with God. A guarantee....I am holding on to that promise. So, hear is the song for you. It is a very honest representation of where Matt and I are right now, but it WILL be reborn.
http://www.godtube.com/watch/?v=0FJC2JNU
Thank you for your continued prayers. God is showing me daily that He IS still working.
Saturday, November 17, 2012
Adoption is like a Half Marathon
It occurred to me the other day on a long run that our adoption process has been like a half marathon. (I know another epiphany while running, but long runs give you lots of opportunity to think)=) So, here is why. When you start a half marathon you don't know where the course is going to take you. Last week when we were running we knew there would be a finish line but we had no idea what would be in between the start and the finish. (and Matt thanks God for that, because he said if had known how hilly it was, he would not have run it) Your goal while in the midst of it is to just keep running. You will never get to the the finish if you stop.
So, here is my grand analogy...when we started this adoption process we knew there would be a start and a finish. There have been many times in this process that we have considered quitting, often because we are unsure of what God really wants for our lives. And we are still in the process of wondering. But like that Half, I know there will be a finish line. Our goal was to have a family...so we carry on and move toward the goal. But, unlike last weeks half though, this is not the pace that I would choose to get there, which maybe my bigger struggle. But I will save that topic for another post.
To update you on where we are....we are still in the race and unsure if we are close to the finish. We are in the process of updated our home study once again. Which means, another round of electronic fingerprints and background checks. So, as you think of us in the future pray that we have a clear direction of where God is taking us and that we will have the strength to finish this race.
So, here is my grand analogy...when we started this adoption process we knew there would be a start and a finish. There have been many times in this process that we have considered quitting, often because we are unsure of what God really wants for our lives. And we are still in the process of wondering. But like that Half, I know there will be a finish line. Our goal was to have a family...so we carry on and move toward the goal. But, unlike last weeks half though, this is not the pace that I would choose to get there, which maybe my bigger struggle. But I will save that topic for another post.
To update you on where we are....we are still in the race and unsure if we are close to the finish. We are in the process of updated our home study once again. Which means, another round of electronic fingerprints and background checks. So, as you think of us in the future pray that we have a clear direction of where God is taking us and that we will have the strength to finish this race.
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
Possible Next Chapter
Hmm...words are eluding me this morning. I had every intention of being my usually creative self, =), but I think you will have to settle for straight forward. There is alot on my mind right now so I am just going to jump in.
Matt and I are prayerfully considering adopting a foster child or children. We have not had much success on the baby front and I have felt like God has laid these children on my heart lately. I want to be up front with all of you, we do not want to be foster parents. I don't think my heart could take that. We are only looking at children whose parents have relinquished their rights.
Matt and I had to travel to Indy this past Saturday and while there I had a wonderful and encouraging conversation with my sister-in-law, LeAnn. She helped me to see many positives in adopting older children or possible siblings. I love her and how she sees the good in everything! But that conversation spurred a much needed conversation between Matt and I. I will admit that the conversation about the adoption had broken down a bit. But after an emotional conversation we got to the root of the problem, frustration. And now that we know it is there and could possible hold us back from God's plans, we know how to fight it.
So, please pray with us that the Lord will help us to get past any concerns that we might have, the grieving we may feel in not getting a baby, and to know what direction God truly wants us to walk in. (I really wish His voice was a little louder in our ears, but we are learning to be quiet and listen.)
I want to close by thanking those who have been praying for us and encouraging us, as we walk this path. You will never know how much it has helped us, we love you all!
Matt and I are prayerfully considering adopting a foster child or children. We have not had much success on the baby front and I have felt like God has laid these children on my heart lately. I want to be up front with all of you, we do not want to be foster parents. I don't think my heart could take that. We are only looking at children whose parents have relinquished their rights.
Matt and I had to travel to Indy this past Saturday and while there I had a wonderful and encouraging conversation with my sister-in-law, LeAnn. She helped me to see many positives in adopting older children or possible siblings. I love her and how she sees the good in everything! But that conversation spurred a much needed conversation between Matt and I. I will admit that the conversation about the adoption had broken down a bit. But after an emotional conversation we got to the root of the problem, frustration. And now that we know it is there and could possible hold us back from God's plans, we know how to fight it.
So, please pray with us that the Lord will help us to get past any concerns that we might have, the grieving we may feel in not getting a baby, and to know what direction God truly wants us to walk in. (I really wish His voice was a little louder in our ears, but we are learning to be quiet and listen.)
I want to close by thanking those who have been praying for us and encouraging us, as we walk this path. You will never know how much it has helped us, we love you all!
Thursday, July 5, 2012
My Prayer "Lord, help me be like a weed..."
I am sure the title of this post makes most of you curious, so let me explain.
This morning while I was running I noticed something...weeds. In this summer of heat, humidity and no rain the only thing growing are weeds. And even though they are weeds some produce the most beautiful flowers. They are the brilliant shades of pink and purple. Their stems and leaves also hold the color that has been alluding us these days...green. I ran and wondered about weeds. Then I prayed a simple prayer, "Lord, help me to be like a weed."
And here is why. In our eyes, there is nothing that the earth is giving them right now to support life. It is hot, dry and just plain miserable, but in all our yards alive and well, weeds. Think how strong and resourceful they must be. They are getting nutrients when everything else is dying. I want to be like that. I want to be walking through this dry and desolate time and still be thriving.
Matt and I feel like we are walking a path that is dry and desolate. We are sucking up every drop of nutrients we can find for our souls and some days still feel malnourished. So, "Lord, help me to be like a weed." In this season of waiting and not knowing what God has for us, my prayer is that we can be strong and resourceful enough to still flourish. If God can create a weed with all it's strength and resourcefulness, then think how strong and resourceful I must be?! Wow!
So today and in the days to come, "Lord, help me to be like a weed."
This morning while I was running I noticed something...weeds. In this summer of heat, humidity and no rain the only thing growing are weeds. And even though they are weeds some produce the most beautiful flowers. They are the brilliant shades of pink and purple. Their stems and leaves also hold the color that has been alluding us these days...green. I ran and wondered about weeds. Then I prayed a simple prayer, "Lord, help me to be like a weed."
And here is why. In our eyes, there is nothing that the earth is giving them right now to support life. It is hot, dry and just plain miserable, but in all our yards alive and well, weeds. Think how strong and resourceful they must be. They are getting nutrients when everything else is dying. I want to be like that. I want to be walking through this dry and desolate time and still be thriving.
Matt and I feel like we are walking a path that is dry and desolate. We are sucking up every drop of nutrients we can find for our souls and some days still feel malnourished. So, "Lord, help me to be like a weed." In this season of waiting and not knowing what God has for us, my prayer is that we can be strong and resourceful enough to still flourish. If God can create a weed with all it's strength and resourcefulness, then think how strong and resourceful I must be?! Wow!
So today and in the days to come, "Lord, help me to be like a weed."
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