Now What?

This question, albeit short and sweet, has continually raced across our minds in the last month, specifically during the week of Christmas and last weekend as we rang in the new year.

Now What? What do we do...we wait. We wait until God brings us new news of great hope and truth. Its not overly realistic to think that our child will be found lying in a manger. Nor is it likely that our child will be crucified for our sins. But there was such as baby that did all this and his name was Jesus, King of Kings, Em manual. Now, I know its a bit late (from a calendar perspective) to be reflecting on the Christmas Story. The fact of the matter is that the Christmas Story has no time or date. Yes, from a chronological standpoint it does but for Christians every day is Christmas. Yes, we had a wonderful Christmas and were infinitely blessed with gifts. No offense to anyone that gave us gifts but we would have traded all of them for that one special gift in a second (really a nano-second). Christmas is a wonderful time and we pray that you had a wonderful season with your family remembering the true meaning for the season.


As we look to the days and months ahead we ask ourselves the question Now what....For me (or us), the answer to the question Now What? is we wait. We wait for that special someone to pick us, to get that phone call, to take the next step. There are many steps to go and many we are ready to take. But now, we sit, we listen, and we ask God for patience. Patience as we eagerly and passionately wait to bring a healthy baby into our lives. Oh, that will be the day. Tears will roll, joy will be felt, love will be in the air, and we will be one step closer to expanding our family. Until then we ask the question, Now What? Now what we do is remain faithful and keep our hearts and minds open to the path God has foretold for our lives.

We appreciate your prayers and thoughts. We are learning valuable lessons that God wants to teach us. We have been chosen for this path with faith and hand in hand we take the steps that will lead down the path.

Another decision made

We wanted to let everyone know that we decided against having our profile shown to the young lady that I wrote about in previous blog. There were some concerns we had with her smoking and the additional children that she has. When it came down to it, we felt like we were letting our need to have a child cloud our judgement, when it came to the health of the baby, both now and in the future.

We also would like just a few extra prayers. This time last year we were hoping we would be a more complete family this Christmas. And I know that Matt and I are both struggling. As Matt has wrote before, we have many things to be thankful for and we serve an amazing God, who will supply all our needs. WE just need to remember that it is according to His will and timing not ours. (I feel like I have said this many times)

I know when we finally have the child that God wants, we will look back and thank God for this amazing journey that bought us to them! Just have to keep on moving and believing!

Many Blessings,
Mandy

Prayer Concern

We received the December update letter from Bethany yesterday, in this update they asked us to be open to a placement of a women early in her pregnancy. We are considering making ourselves available to this girl. Our concern is that it is early in her pregnancy, making us unavailable to anyone else. Also, she has two other children, ages 6 and 2. We are concerned because this child would be leaving biological siblings. Please pray with us as we make this decision. Pray that we have discernment in this process that we will continue to walk in God's will.

Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving...What does that mean to you? "Its a time to be thankful." Yes, it is but that is the easy answer. What does it really mean to you? If you really think about it there is so much to be thankful for. First and Foremost, we must all be Thankful for God's mercy and provision, he gave his only son to give us ever lasting life. While we all know what that means, I challenge you to think about what that truly means. It means above all, his (God) desire to have personal relationship was so strong that he gave his son. If you are reading this blog you know we do not have children. I can only imagine what it would be like to give up a child for the good of all man. Just think about it. Get rid of all that stuff in your mind. The turkey will be fine in the oven. Work will be there later or tomorrow. We only think about this gift at Christmas or Easter but I challenge you to think about this gift during this season of Thanksgiving. After all, we are all thankful for how God works in our lives.

I'm thankful for God, ABBA, Father.
I'm thankful for Mandy for the joy, comfort, hope, and love she brings into my life
I'm thankful for Bud and Daisy for the unconditional love, joy, and entertainment they bring into my life (not to mention the dirt and mud!),
I'm thankful for our families, the support and love they show us in many ways during this season in our lives.
I'm thankful for our friends for the support and listening ear to hear our frustrations and not judge but offer comfort and friendship.
I'm thankful for our colleagues for their interest in our lives, for their desire to help us succeed in our careers and our home life.
I'm thankful for you! For taking the time out of your busy life to read this blog.

I'm thankful for where we are at in the adoption process. It would be easy be frustrated, mad, discontent, and full of a vast array of negative emotions for having to go down this road. But, that would only serve as a platform for the devil to enter into our lives. While its certainly not easy we lift up this situation to God! He knows our thoughts and emotions and if we lift those worries to him, he will provide us with comfort. It would be much easier to be in control, to be in the drivers seat if you will. But its not our place nor should it be. God is in control and he knows what is best for our lives. There is a reason and while we may not know what it is and we may not know the outcome of this journey, we know its his will for our lives. Beyond that nothing matters.

Christ teaches us to be thankful for all that he has provide for us. Its easy to be thankful when all is going well in your live (at least according to man's definition of perfect). Be thankful in the hard times; praise God for the journey, the trials, and the tribulations. Let him take you through those times for its through those times faith is strengthened and true meaning of being faithful and thankfulness will be bore to you.

We are not through this journey, frankly, we could be just getting started. But we are thankful. We are thankful for the people we have met during the journey, the opportunity this journey has provided for us to grow in faith, to grow closer together as a couple, and most importantly to grow closer to God.

This may not have made much sense to you. After all, its just the ramblings of mere man. If you take nothing else away from this posting take these points away.
- God is good all the time
- Be Thankful for the gift of Jesus Christ.
- Grow in faith and be open to the journey that God has for your life (no matter what it is!)

I see Thanksgiving starts in 45 minutes. But thanksgiving is so much more than a day! Everyday is Thanksgiving!

May the richness of God's love fill your hearts,
-Matt

Decision

Matt and I have decided not to change our preferences, after much prayer and consideration. This might mean that we will not be picked before the end of this year, but we feel a tremendous peace about it. Thank you to all who lifted us up in your prayers. It makes all the difference! God is good.

October Update

Well, one more month has passed and we are still waiting. It seems that we on a roller coaster ride of emotions these days. But God is good and seems that when one of us is struggling the other one of us is a rock.

There are still 12 mothers working with Bethany that need to be placed with families. Of which, six of the mothers are diagnosed with Bi-Polar or other mental health issues. We had put as one of our preferences that the mother not have any mental health issues. We are being asked by Bethany, to reconsider this preferences. Please pray with us as we consider this. We are doing more research and sorting through things. Sometimes it feels we are doing a research project instead of waiting to become a family. Pray with us that we receive the child that God wants us to have. It is so hard to know what to do, knowing how badly we want a child. We really just want God to work in this situation.

We thank you so much for your prayer and words of encouragement during this time. It truly is how we are getting through this. I also want to thank those of you who have supported us financially during this process. You will never know how much that has meant to us and how blessed we feel to have friends and family like you!

Waiting....

Waiting...I am reading a book called Baby, We Were Meant for Each Other by Scott Simon, and it talked about how people want to know what the progress is during your adoption process and well all you can say is you are waiting. I so badly wish I could give a better answer, to be witty enough to think of something clever. But to my dismay, I am not. We are waiting. The good news is, is that Bethany Christian Services is working with 20 birth mothers right now, of which only 9 of them are placed with an adoptive family. So, we could still know something by the end of the year.

I also heard something this weekend that resonated within my soul. I was listening to the radio on the way to the store and heard the quote, "Our plan B is God's way of making us into the people we need to become in Him." That quote was followed by the Micheal W. Smith song Healing Rain. I needed to hear this or maybe, be reminded of this. Matt and I constantly go back to; it would be easy if, this is not what 'we' wanted or why do we have to go through all of this. And you know, after hearing that quote this weekend, I don't need to know why right now. All I need to know is that God is using His plan 'A' our plan B, to make us the individuals He wants us to be. And that is so much better then anything I could ever be on my own.

Matt and I thank you for your prayers. They are what is keeping us going right now. God is still good, even if it takes a little reminding sometimes.